EXCERPT

The following excerpt is offered to potential readers to give an idea of the style and content of Stephen Nicholson's memoir A Dangerous Love. It comes from the "Interlude" Stephen placed roughly half way through the book.

Before continuing with the story of my career and describing the hazardous way in which I finally found a way into the rather secret world of active boy-love, meeting many new wonderful and interesting people, and some less than savoury ones, I will pause here to present three short cameos which illustrate just how boys have changed since the 1980s. All of them took place before my sex life had truly begun and might be regarded as “missed opportunities” by those less green than I.

2) Boy on Newhaven/Dieppe cross-channel ferry.

Quite often in the holidays my mother and various friends of hers would make a day trip to Dieppe. It was absurdly cheap and, if one set off very early in the morning, one would be in time for an excellent meal at a French café. There would then be plenty of time in the afternoon to go shopping to stock up on wine, cheese et cetera before the tedious four-hour journey back.

On this occasion, I was travelling with my mother and Mary, the girl my mother had raised and who was then living in Worthing. As usual, I wandered off to explore the large boat on my own.

It was not at all busy and I found myself in a large deserted area with wooden seats fixed to the floor, extremely close together. At first I thought I was alone. Then I caught sight of a mop of fair hair in the middle of one of the rows.

The mop turned, revealing the handsome smiling face of a boy of about twelve. I had scarcely time to react before he addressed me in a beguilingly friendly West Country accent.

“Hello! You on your own then?”

“Er, no, not exactly!”

“Why don’t you come and sit down for a while next to me?”

“Oh, OK.”

As the absurdly small seats were so close together, I moved into the row and sat down leaving a chair between him and myself.

“’Ere, what you doin’? I said next to me. Cummon!”

I needed no further encouragement, although this meant that our bodies were touching, something the boy seemed to like, as did I of course.

“So, I’m Tom. What’s your name then?”

“Stephen.” After a slight pause I added: “Where are your parents?”

“Oh they’re asleep upstairs. It gets so borin’.”

“What do they do?”

“They’re teachers!”

He then looked up at me with a cheeky smile on his face. “Hey, have you got a guuuurlfriend then?”

“Er, no!”

“Neither have I, guuurls are borin’!”

There followed some more idle chatter, during which the sides of our legs and bodies remained in close contact. Was it my imagination or was the boy actively pressing against me? And was I being rather bold and doing the same? Whatever, it felt very good and I loved his company and sparkle. About fifteen minutes must have passed before the spell was broken by other passengers entering the area.

I can’t recall who moved first, but there was reluctance on both sides. We eventually parted with a non-committal “See you again then”, which of course neither of us ever did.